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The Aw Yeah! page contains material that is far too experimental or unstable for the more normal confines of The Toilet Paper.   A new AwYeah! is added each Monday.  Sometimes.  

This week's new AwYeah!...

MY RESUME
Someone has to lead us into the new millenium.  I'd like to apply...

LIFE AS A LOLLIPOP - yet another wonderful short story by the Editor In Chief.  Is it autobiographical?   Only two people know for sure.

THE GREAT VENICE BEACH DIME GIVEAWAY - We tried our hardest to give away free money. Really we did.

JEWS FOR JERRY - Jerry Springer is the New Messiah.  How do we know?  We're members of the Church of Springer. 

INTERVIEW - At the TP we're not afraid to talk with the people that matter most.  And we're not afraid to post sound clips on the web either.  Hear from the self proclaimed world's greatest wino and sex counselor among others.

WWW.WHO-OWNS-WHAT.COM
Who got all those domain names you should've gotten?  Aren't you lucky that we checked for you...

AN OPEN LETTER TO PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON - We are no longer accepting hatemail regarding this piece.

HATEMAIL - People get moderately passionate when it comes to defending their right to oral sex.

OH MY $#&*%^!@ GOD - The most horrendous, most vile, most despicable tale you'll ever read.   Not for the faint of heart.  Pregnant woman and children with sickle cell anemia should not read!

A TYPICAL "THREE-PACK-A-DAY - The TP joins a three-pack-a-day smoker for 18 hours.

SIERRA BLANCA - Just where does all that human waste from New York City end up.  Warning, this is a botched attempt at serious journalism.

E-MAIL YOUR CONGRESSPERSON ABOUT THE IMPEACHMENT PROCEEDINGS... IT'S YOUR CIVIC DUTY TO BAFFLE THEM

JUST HOW FAR HAVE I DEVOLVED?
alternately entitled: "DID I REALLY JUST URINATE IN THAT BOTTLE OF CORONA?"

THE POWER HOUR - Your very own Editor-In-Chief attempts to drink 60 shots of beer in one hour.  Coming soon, sixy shots of coffee.

AND NOW, THE SOBER PERSPECTIVE - By staff writer Reechard Chang

SEX MAKES THE NET GO ROUND - Alternately entitled, "Our Experience With Link Exchange.

MAGNUS, THE SWEDE WHO DRANK TOO MUCH - To continue with the alcohol theme, another true story.

THE fART GALLERY - Featuring the works of the great Pablo Poocasso.  Yes, Mr. Poocasso defecates on canvas and yes, these works are pictured and are for sale.  This is really true.   STG.

THE TP EVALUATES THE BEST MOSH PITS - Sort of.

ASS I LAY DYING - By constipated staff writer Dan Buck

AND THE WINNER IS - The TP holds a contest to see which readers have the most fascinating bathroom horror stories.

THE BLACK MAN'S KEEPING ME DOWN - A sensitive essay by Theodore Johnston VI

THE BOTTLE - A brief and pointless story by the Editor-In-Chief.

FIRST DIARY ENTRY IN MY NEW COMPUTER - It's so fashionable to hate Microsoft...why even bother?  Then again....

MY THREE FRIENDS - Damn guys.  What the hell were you thinking?

OOZE - So anyway, I go out and watch Matt's girlfriend Missy and her band play at all the local bars.  I go with MJ to Burning Man.  I support their book.  We give them plenty of links to Ooze.  And the lazy bastards still don't get a link up on their 'zine to The Toilet Paper.  So we finally decided to claim Ooze as an AwYeah!.  Aggressive?   Yes.  Unprecidented?  Of course (this is the AwYeah! section after all).  Immoral?  Only Ooze is immoral.

oh crap. - This one never really had a point.  Then again, neither did Roy Lichtenstein and look where he is now.

A FLOWCHART DAY IN THE LIFE OF ROGER-THE-MANAGER AND JENKINS-THE-OFFICE-IF-BOY - Alternately entitled, "The day I learned how to use a Visio.

 

Learn more about AwYeah!  Granted, you won't learn much, but you'll learn something.  No you won't.

Thanks for reading.  Thoughts?  mailto:thoughts@thetp.com