|The Toilet Paper is lucky to have so talented and
varied a staff. Thanks to all of our dedicated employees for the hard work and energy they
put in. Please note that any similarity in appearance of staff members is purely
||John T. Cross
Position: President, Founder, Chairman, CEO, Man In Black
Bio: It was John T's vision that gave birth to The Toilet Paper. Through his leadership,
The Toilet Paper may ultimately achieve its mission of "crushing the life out of the
bastards at MTV".
Position: Editor In Chief
Bio: It may have been John T.'s vision, but it has been Bernard's sweat that has made the
dream a reality. Bernard puts in incredible hours, sometimes as many as 120 or even 130 a
week keeping things afloat at the TP.
Bio: We're not entirely sure about the identity of this man. He is quick, efficient, a man
of few words. We know he has no family, no permanent address. He has nerves of steel and
the cunning of a fox. All of this makes him the perfect person to post the TP in bathroom
stalls across America. Especially the women's bathrooms.
||Daniel Pierce Buck, Jr.
Position: Photographer, Graphics Designer
Bio: Flamboyant, sassy, an unmistakable flair for the outrageous, it is Dan who gives the
TP that special zest. Silly irrelevances and fanciful whims are Dan's specialty.
It is Reechard (as he prefers to be called, with a stress on the 'Ree') who is responsible
for the dramatic, acclaimed column, "Buzzed; Tales of An Alcoholic". In
Reechard's occasional sober moments, he enjoys fly-fishing and crocheting.
Reechard has been banned. We are proud to announce his replacement,
Bio: Brandon is the man on the back end, the support that keeps the TP running.
Position: Public Relations
Bio: Jon, pictured here relating to the public, has been integral in establishing the TP's
reputation for excellence. The woman pictured is Maria del Pilar Agejas Chicharro Martin
Gonzalo, "the lady of many last names". Maria was one of the first subscribers
to the TP and has submitted several as of yet unpublished articles.
Position: Waiter, Cook
Bio: Exceptional service with a smile is Seba's specialty. Feeding the corps of
writers, webmasters, editors and reporters (most not pictured) is a daunting task that
Seba performs with style and pride.
Position: Man with Goatee
Bio: Every innovative, on-line magazine needs it's man with goatee and Le Morte is our
man. Le Morte's edgy style and ever-present facial hair make everyone feel
An avid reader of the TP, Mark is constantly working on his comics in his secret drawing
||As the nametag on his shirt indicates, this is Joe the Janitor. Joe is a
simple, pleasant fellow who has worked at the TP since its inception. Quiet and a little
slow, Joe goes about his daily chores with a whistle, a smile, and a vigor the keeps
everyone's spirits high.
|The Toilet Paper is an Equal Opportunity Employer and does not discriminate on the
basis of race, sex, nationality, creed, religious affiliation, sexual orientation or
disability. We do, however, discriminate based upon city of birth; specifically, those
from Cincinnati need not apply.
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