Skep × ti ×
cism – n. A doubting or questioning attitude or state of mind; dubiety.
It sure ain’t like the good old days, is it? People are just so darn skeptical.
Sigh. So in an effort gage the suspicion level of the general populace, we decided to give
away money, no strings attached. We sat on the Venice Beach boardwalk with a jar full of
dimes and the following poster:
The Great Venice Beach
!DIME OFFER!
Today only we will give out one dime
($.10 legal U.S. tender) for only one
nickel ($.05 legal U.S. tender).
This results in a 100% profit for you!
Event subsidized by: The Toilet paper
Limit one per customer. Must be 18 or have parents permission.
Employees of The Toilet Paper are not eligible to participate.
The woman selling straw dolls next to us
saw the strange looks we were getting and finally got up to read the poster.
"You’re giving out dimes? For a nickel?" We had our first customer.
But giving away money was an uphill battle from there on out. "Get a job!"
one man yelled at us.
"But sir, we’re not asking for money. We’re trying to giveyou
money. Please, take a dime."
"Why don’t you stop begging and get a job!" he retorted. We considered
throwing a dime at his head, but in the end decided it wasn’t worth the headache.
For the next hour people paused, read the sign, gave us questioning looks and walked
on. Not a single person dared to make the exchange. Flustered, we stepped up the marketing
campaign, chanting, "Free money! Free money! Get your free money here!" Alas
this discouraged people even more. "Maybe the sign’s too complicated," we
reasoned and created another, simpler poster:
The Great Venice Beach
DIME GIVEAWAY
ASK FOR YOUR FREE DIME!
TODAY ONLY!
Sponsored by
The Toilet Paper.
Fifteen minutes later we got our first real customer. A girl approached and said,
"You’re weird, but cool. Can I have my dime?"
"Hey Momma! Momma, get over here," the straw-doll-woman next to us called out
to a homeless lady digging through the trash. "Momma, tell these guys to give you a
dime." Customer number two. The customers came pouring in after that:
Big fat black woman walked up, said "Where’s my dime?" and shoved her
palm in my face.
Drunk guy. "Heeeyyyy, what time is it? Is it noon yet. No? Wow, I’ve finished
three Bloody Mary’s before noon. Alright! Hey, can I have a cigarette instead of my
dime? No? Okay, can I have my dime? Alright! You really gave me a dime! Thanks, man!
Thanks."
Older woman with a Georgetown University sweatshirt. According to her, both of her
children were out of school but were living at home. "I hope you all have other
jobs."
Long haired dude.
Guy from Quebec in yellow shirt with accent. "This doesn’t happen in
Quebec."
Young kid, 15-ish.
Another kid, also 15-ish.
Third kid. "Get the hell out of here," we yelled. "It’s one per
group."
And that marked the end of the day. Seven hours, ten dimes. The great Venice Beach Dime
Giveaway.